Why Does My Sister and Brother Insist on Doing Things Behind Mom's Back?

There's a few things left at mom's house.

My sister just wrote to me and said she was going to have mom stay at her house tonight so my brother could go and put some things out in the trash.... and asked if I could get the 'Goodwill' boxes over to Goodwill this weekend without her knoweing... b/c she'll want to go through them again.

Honestly, I don't have any issues going thru the boxes with mom again.... afterall, I went thru them with her the first time.... and we decided they were either too big or too old....

Yes, mom keeps thinking these are things she wanted to keep, but they are not... and I think including mom in this decision is important b/c she doesn't know what happened to a lot of stuff and it's disconcerting to her.

This time, when we go through the box, we'll make sure to bring them right away to Goodwill to donate so she doesn't have to remember if they are keeps or giveaways.

Friends out there in Internet land, have you struggled with this type of thing and how did you handle it?

#elderlycare #momsmovedin #parentalcare #momsinthehouse #careforparents #howtohandleagingparents #agingparents

Ugh! Some Adjustments Are Needed

I think everyone knows that when a parent picks up and moves in with their grown, adult children after 35+ years apart, there's going to be some adjustments needed when the household combines into one home.

I mean, come on, it's a given.

What's not typical is that the 'in-law' (my hubby) has been on disability for 23+ years,  is in pain, recently went through a hospital stay of 6+ weeks to ween him from his Dr. prescribed narcotics over the years, and is just a tad bit difficult to live with when he's in pain.

I get it, it sucks to be in pain, but really?

He's short with me, our son and now mom... 

When we were pre-injury and young, my parents helped us out all the time with basic necessities... my mom helped us so much.... I owe so much, excuse me, WE owe so much to her and her generosity over the years whether it was time, money or talent, she was and is always there for us.  

As such, I don't belive she owes us one thing and the rest of her life should be filled with peace and enjoyment.

Yes, mom has some habits that differ from ours... for example, she hangs the kitchen towels from the drawers instead of the dishwasher or oven handles like we do... no biggie, I just take them off the drawer, fold them and place them on the appliance handles... DONE! OVER! FINISHED!.... not with my hubby.

 

He has to complain that she keeps putting them on the drawer... why can't she put them back where she got them?

Or another of his pet peeves, when mom 'washes' the dishes that are in the sink and lays them on a towel on the coutner to dry... he hates when things are left on the counter oh, and it doesn't help that they are not washed fully... i.e. little lipstick on the glasses.... OMG!  You would think that she killed his favorite toy!  I simply let her do it and later come back and load the stuff into the dishwasher... I often suggest just place it in the dishwasher but oh well, for over 80+ years habits become hard to break.

Dear readers, have any of you ever run into a situation like this and HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO SURVIVE IT?  I honestly am ready to throw in the towel vs. hanging it on the drawer or hanging it on one of the appliances!!!!!

#elderlycare #seniorcare #agingparents #toomanycooksinthekitchen #adjustingtomom #livingwithmom

What?

I am sure I am not alone in this taking care of your parent situation but
has anyone else in this situation been driven nuts by a constant barrage of
What?...

What?...

What?....

I've told mom several times that she needs to get a hearing aid because 
everytime I say something, she says... 'What?'

And I have to repeat myself...

And it's just the start of my having to repeat myself...

God, give me the strength and humor to continue down this path.

Can a daughter get an AMEN!?

AMEN!

#elderlycare #momsinthehouse #takingcareofmom #parentalcare #agingparents

Sniffles and the Change of Weather...

If you reside in an area of the country where there are four seasons, do you find that when the seasons change, you usually get a cold and the sniffles?

Maybe it's not the seasonal changes, it could be the little 4 and 1 year old rug rats that visit who could be described as the cutest ball of germs on the planet.... hmmm, I may be onto something.

The weekend before last, I had the joy of having my grandsons with me.  The older one, Dylan, had a cold and his voice sounded like someone else was living inside him.  He didn't have any complaints, no not feeling wells, no I feel sick, no I can't swallow... he was perfectly fine except for this new voice from within... but you could tell, he was fighting a ccccccooooollllllddddddd!

Fast forward to the following Thursday night, it was as if someone had a 'cold' switch and flicked it on!  Before dinner I was feeling fine, okie-dokie, peachy, honkey dorey.... but by the time I was finished dinner, I noticed a slight scratchiness to my throat... ahem, ahem, ahem.... rut roh!

Those gorgeous germs had been transfered to me by my adorable grands!  Dagnabbit!

So my time last weekend was spent in bed, tired, sleepy and full of phlem.  Plus I had a slight headache to boot!  Can you say this weekend sucks... beautiful weather and I am stuck in bed... heck, I didn't wake up and go downstairs until 3:15pm!!! YIKES!

Sunday I did force myself to get up, dressed and out of the house... even with that nagging headache... I know it was a sinus headache, just the way it lingered... but I did have phlem and I did have a runny nose.

Hey, wait a minute, isnt' this called It's Not Always ApParent???? or did I change the name to It's Not Always About Me????... naw, this is where the parent enters the story... hold your horses peeps!

So as you know, my faithful followers (all zippo of you), mom now lives with me... so she too was here when the boys spent the weekend... she too loves these little germ monsters to death and they love her too.... so she too was exposed to the nasty germs....

Well, as luck would have it, she's developed the cold this week... and has phlem and is coughing and nasal drip too!  So what?  Well, as you may recall, this whole 'what to do about mom' dilemma started when mom was hospitalized in March... that was because her meds were not adminstered and taken correctly but... the hospital stay before that one was because she got a cold that turned into pneumonia...

I'll have to keep an eye on her to make sure she continues to expel the phlem v. sucking it down.... don't need a hospital stay...

So, knowing that mom doesn't eat as she should either and has this cold, has anyone out there who's cared for their elderly parent in this situation have any ideas on how to keep her healthy under the circumstances?

#elderlycare #lovemom #momsinthehouse #momcare #itsnotalwaysapparent #howtodealwithagingparents #agingparents

So It's Been Placed on the Market...

And while awaiting the MLS posting, 

the realtor sent a message that it's

We may settle in early December!

Can I get a Whoo Hoo!

#eldercare, #momsmovedin, #momsinthehouse, #lovemom

730 Is Just About on the Market... Can You Say Hooray?!?!?!?!?!!?

Hip, hip, hooray!

Had the realtor over, mom signed the paperwork and all's that left is for us to go over the Seller's Property Disclosure Statement and return to realtor... then it's officially placed on the MLS and it's up for sale.

We priced it to sell and hope that there's some traffic early and it sells quickly.  It would be such a great feeling to get this sold and mom have a nice cushion to spend on herself!

 

As you might expect, getting this house ready and on the market has been the monkey on our collective backs and we're just about ready to sling that chimp across the room!Keep your fingers cross it sells for asking price and fast too!

#eldercare, #momsmovedin, #momsinthehouse, #lovemom

And She'll Have Fun, Fun, Fun...

Mom 'works' on most Thursdays...


Actually she volunteers at 'The Attic', a not-for-profit shop of gently used clothing and household items.  Once located in our county seat, it moved to a location in my sister's neighborhood about 4 years ago.  


One of her very best friends, who's older than mom, also works there and they have for years.  It is run by Sister, but the organization that benefits from 'The Attic's' proceeds develop unique, innovative services for people with disabilities. 


Typically the work day starts about mid-day and they have their lunch in the back room. 

Today was like all the other days...


As mom was in the back room, someone came into the store asking if anyone owned a bluish, silverish car out front and held a piece of it in her hands.  That's right folks, it was part of the car that had come off when this dear lady hit mom's car in the parking lot.


Long story short, police came wrote a report, auto insurance info was exchanged and there was minimal damage... a small dent and couple of scratches... oh and the moulding that runs along the base of the front fender...


My sister called me to ask how bad the damage was... and I had no idea, mom had not told me about the accident.  I took a few pics but our local repair guy had already place the moulding back onto the car and the scratches were simply that, scratches.  Not sure that any further work needs to be done.... afterall, it's a 1996 purple T-Bird...


And she'll have fun, fun, fun 'til her daddy takes her T-Bird away!